Passenger's Seat

I would love to say I’m a go-with-the-flow kind of gal but the truth is, I just want to be in control. How many of us can openly admit that we just want to jump behind the wheel and drive ourselves? If you’ve ever driven in the car with me, I’m sorry.

I really just want to have control of my destination. Can we agree that most of the time our plans don’t go the way we imagined them? The destination we wanted to arrive at was different than what we expected. Often leaving us confused and defeated, asking ourselves, “Did I take a wrong turn somewhere?

I come from a family of planners, so naturally I became one too. Honestly, I think we’re all secretly planners, it’s the human in us. At one point I felt like I had planned out every area of my life, down to the very outfit I would wear the next day. Sounds extreme but like I said before, I just want to be in control. Wanting to have control made it hard to accept things when they didn’t go my way or rather, the way I planned them to. The first time I truly lost all control was my sophomore year of highschool. By then I had been playing volleyball for a few years and saw myself playing through my senior year- It was just part of the plan. I still remember the way God gently broke my expectations that afternoon. My body was covered in bruises and sweat. I sat in a sea of girls who wanted the same thing as me- to belong somewhere. My coaches quietly posted the numbers above us and I could feel the room holding its breath. Eyes sorted through the numbers, whispers echoed off the wooden floors, “Did you make it?” I thought I read through the numbers too fast. I sat there re-reading each line of numbers over and over. As my friends all hugged in relief that they would be sharing another season together, I was still holding my breath. This wasn’t part of the plan I thought. No, it wasn’t part of my plan but it was a part of Gods.

One thing I think about often, is God’s plan for each of our lives. Isn’t it crazy to think that He planned every single day of our lives before we even took our first breath? He knows the beginning and end, He is the beginning and end- And everything in between. The world tells us that we need to be in control and have it all together but you know what? That’s a lie. When we start to believe the world, we let go of God’s plans and hold on to our own. What we fail to see in the midst of our own plans, is that God did not breathe His life or blessing on them. They are simply man made. In Acts 5:38-39 a man named Gamaliel points out, “If they are planning and doing these things merely on their own, it will soon be overthrown. But if it is from God, you will not be able to overthrow them. You may even find yourselves fighting against God!” The crazy thing is, Gamaliel didn’t even believe in the name of Jesus but he knew that only God’s plans prosper, not our own.

I admit it, I’m still not a go-with-the-flow kind of gal but the past five years of my life have radically led me to occupy the passenger's seat. Slowly, my plans didn’t become my own. Not making the volleyball team led me closer to God and who He made me to be. God has shown me that it was just part of the plan He designed. If I had made the team that year, I wouldn't be the person that I am today. It was still hard though, and for the next few years I battled through seasons of depression. It was those seasons of sorrow that made me stronger and now I realize that walking through them prepared for the next seasons to come- The season when my sister needed a kidney transplant. You see, God has pieced every part of the plan to work for good. Trusting God in areas of my life that I never did before was hard, but the more I did it the easier it became. That’s not to say that everything has gone smoothly and I have my entire life figured out, but I’m not left feeling absolutely defeated when things don’t go my way. While I don’t fully understand why I’ve walked through certains seasons of my life, I know that God is preparing me for what’s to come. He’s slowly piecing together my life, just the way He planned before I even took my first breath. 

I know that it’s hard to climb out of the driver’s seat and let God take the wheel, but I want you to ask yourself this question: “How far has my driving taken me?” When we’re driving, we don’t get very far. We blow a tire, veer off the road, crash and burn. “If they are planning and doing these things merely on their own, it will soon be overthrown”. Maybe God is overthrowing you out of the driver’s seat today and if He is, I want to encourage you to say yes. In my house we say that we have to try things at least three times and then we can decide whether we like something or not. Try sitting in the passenger’s seat three times. Try it today, tomorrow and the next. I promise you He won’t let you down. If you don't know how or where to start here's a prayer for the passenger's seat:

"God thank you for not letting me figure it all out on my own. I trust you and the plans you've designed for my life before I even took my first breath. Right now I surrender all my control to you. Please come and have it all. Give me a peace that surpasses all understanding as I sit in the passenger's seat.. Come and do what only you can do. In Jesus' Name, Amen."